AFTER "AMEN"

1 Samuel 1:12-18

As she kept on praying to the Lord, Eli (the priest) observed her mouth. Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk and said to her, “How long will you keep on getting drunk? Get rid of your wine.” “Not so, my lord,” Hannah replied, “I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the Lord. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief.” Eli answered, “Go in peace, and may the God of Israel grant you what you have asked of Him.” She said, “May your servant find favor in your eyes.” Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was NO LONGER DOWNCAST.

Hannah’s deepest desire was to be a mother. With that deep desire, she poured out her soul to the Lord.

What an example Hannah is to how we should respond after the outpouring of our soul to the Lord.

Have you ever had such a burden that it physically wore you out? Have you ever been consumed by a burden? Is there an area in your life that you continually lay before the Lord? Do you pour out your soul to the Lord?

It says that after Eli’s blessing, Hannah went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast.

How do you respond after you say “Amen”?

I am guilty of this! How many times do we pour out our soul to the Lord and then think about it, stew over it, try to devise our own solutions…and worry about it. When we do this we tend to appear “downcast”. Like it or not, we wear worry on our face, in our posture, in our heart and in our attitude. This is why so many of us have those unmistakable worry lines on our foreheads. 

As believers, God has made us a promise…well, quite a few promises. But, one promise that I continually reiterate in my blogs and remind myself of is from Romans. Romans 8:28 says, In ALL THINGS God works for the GOOD of those who love Him, who have been called according to HIS PURPOSE!

Either I choose to believe His Word to be true or I do not! Our response, my response should reflect our belief that God’s Word is the absolute TRUTH!!! The Lord desires for us to pour out our souls to Him, to leave it there and to trust Him with the outcome. Our attitude and continence should be one of joy! We should be confident that the Lord has answered our prayer because He has promised that in ALL THINGS He is working for our good!!!!! 

In the next 12+ months, my life will be changing drastically. I will send my son off to college, start a new job, sell my home (I hope), move, send my daughter off to college, move again, probably start another new job and start a life in a new city away from where my children call home. I teeter between being so excited about what the future holds and the fear of the unknown.  

One might say to me, “Well, you haven’t experienced a great anguish that brings you to the end of yourself?”. And I would say, “Oh, yes I have!”. It was in, through and being on the other side of that deep anguish that I have learned that God is truly working for my good in ways that I cannot understand!

The challenge for myself, as it is for all of us, it to lay these things before the Lord. And then go on our way believing that God has heard us and has already answered our prayer. This promise is not an “Oh and by the way”. This promise from Romans is what lays the foundation on which we stand! What does it say about my faith in the Lord if I pour my heart out to the Lord then wring my hands in worry and dredge up all my fears?! What good it is if I project a lack of confidence in the Lord with my worries and concerns?!

After I say “Amen”:

My response should be one of trust in the Lord! My response should make an impact on others! My response should draw others closer to the Lord! My response should example my faith in the Lord and in His Sovereignty! My response should create a joy within me that is evident to others! My response should create a quiet strength and steadfast confidence as I approach my days ahead! My response should result in an overwhelming peace within me! My response should be one of praise to the Lord!

My response should always bring glory to the Lord!!!

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for always answering my prayers! Thank you for giving me the understanding that Your answer is not always yes, but Your answer is ALWAYS for my good and ALWAYS for Your glory! Thank you for Your Word! Thank you for making it a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

Lord, I pray that You would continually change my response to the prayers that I lay before You each day! May my response be one of joy as I eagerly await Your Hand to reveal what You have already been working out for my good!

Lord, I pray that those who are downcast would experience a noticeable transformation as they grip on to Your promises! I pray that Your Holy Spirit would consume those crying out to You and that they would be overwhelmed with Your presence and peace! 

Lord, I love you!

In Jesus’ Name, Amen…and may my heart rejoice!

"Who Am I?!"

There I sat in the counselor's office. My intention for counseling was for two people to work on saving their marriage...my first marriage.

My counselor asked me a question that I had never been asked before, one that I had never thought of before... “Lynn, who are you?”. I was silent. I am sure my face spoke of the blank thoughts I was experiencing. Then, the answers started. “Well, I am Lynn so and so, I am a wife, I am a pastor's wife, I am a mother, I am a daughter and a daughter-in-law, I am a sister and a sister-in-law, I am a friend, I am a “Christian”, I am a greeter at church, I am a...”

Occasionally, during the 3+ years of counseling, Dr. Dodd would ask me “Lynn, who are you?”. I learned that I needed to get this question. The Lord was preparing me for what He knew was coming.

The honest answer was that I did not really know who I was. My identity was wrapped up in the roles I lived out in my life. I allowed other people to define who I was or I defined who I was by what others thought of me. As a result of this, if all the sudden my “wife” identity came to a crashing end, the whole core of who I am is destroyed. Which was ALMOST the case. My first marriage did come to a crashing end. However, the whole core of who I am was solidified and strengthened as I learned the most valuable lesson. I learned that my identity is in Christ alone...in my Lord!

My whole identity can be summed up in one statement. I am a child of the Lord!

What exactly does this mean? Why is this so important for me to understand? What does this change about how I live my life?

As my first husband made the decision to leave and start his own life, my life was seemingly coming to an end. My “purpose” was gone. This was all I knew. I loved being a wife and a mother. Even though I was still a mother, that was going to change drastically. So, what would that role look like? What would my future look like? I had been a wife and mother for many years. This is what I loved. Yes, this did define me! So, as the ground was being destroyed under my feet, I began to fall. I teetered between moments of God's protection and fears of losing everything. Needless to say, I was standing on sinking sand!

My counselor was relentless regarding me learning my true identity. As he walked with me, revealing the TRUTHS in God's word, my answers to that question began to change. As those answers began to change, something happened within me. Not only did I notice a change, others began to notice a change. The Lord was strengthening me! The ground on which I was standing became solid because I was no longer allowing the roles I lived and my circumstances to define me. I slowly began to realize why my counselor was so relentless. I was learning that...

As a child of the Lord, I know that the Lord created my inmost being; He knit me together in my mother's womb. I know that I was fearfully and wonderfully made; and His works are wonderful. I know that my frame was not hidden from Him, when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, He saw my unformed body. AND that ALL THE DAYS ordained for me were written in HIS book BEFORE one of them came to be. Psalm 139:13-16

As a child of the Lord, I know that this earth is just a temporary home. My home, my citizenship is in heaven. What I experience on earth is training for what the Lord has prepared for me in heaven. I am being transformed. My inheritance is being kept in heaven. Philippians 3:20-21; 1 Peter 1:3-7

As a child of the Lord, I know that He has plans for me. He has plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

As a child of the Lord, I am His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that I would walk in them. Ephesians 2:10

As a child of the Lord, I know that I am a new creation; the old things have passed away; behold new things have come. 2 Corinthians 5:17

As a child of the Lord, I know that I am an ambassador for Christ. 2 Corinthians 5:20

As a child of the Lord, I know that the Lord is always working for my good. Romans 8:28 This part of my identity is one that gives me great peace. I have confidence that whatever happens in my life good or bad has passed through God's hands and He has allowed for a purpose that is ALWAYS for my good, not always for my comfort, but for my good!

These are just a few of the TRUTHS from God's word that have changed my life and have forever changed who I am. I am quite clear that the Lord planned and prepared for my existence on this earth. He has a foreknowledge that I cannot even begin to comprehend, but that I am extremely grateful for. This gives me peace and strength as I travel this journey of uncertainty on this earth. You never know what tomorrow will bring. But, what I do know is that God is always faithful. He always keeps His promises. He has proved this to me over and over and over again!

As the Israelites wandered for 40 years, I wandered for the first 40 years of my life not knowing who I was or that I even had a defined purpose on this earth. May 4^th, 2007 was a celebration of the end of my wandering years. Never could I have imagined what the Lord had in store for me next.

I have since remarried to the most amazing man! And I have learned that the Lord has a purpose for my life that involves ministering to others through His Word. I think about Job often. Job really did lose everything! But, the Lord blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first! I feel as though the Lord has done the same for me! It is not always easy, but I always feel His goodness. The Lord has gone to great lengths to prepare me to live out the latter part of my life for His glory alone! However, this would not be possible if I had not learned of my true identity!

The one thing that has kept me grounded is God's Word! With the help of the Holy Spirit within me, God's word changed my life...it has changed who I am! It saved me!

Who are you?! Are you consumed with how the world sees you or how God sees you? Do you measure your worth by what others think of you? Do you let money, status, job, outward appearance, etc. define you? I encourage you to ponder these questions and ask God to reveal the TRUTH to you!

Father, use what You have done in my life to be a light to others who are walking this earth with no idea of who they are or that they have a purpose! Thank you, Lord, for holding my hand as you walked me through the fires of affliction. It is through those fires that I learned how much you love me! I am forever thankful! In Jesus' Name, Amen  

Hannah's Cry - 1 Samuel 1:1-20

1 Samuel 1:1-20


The book of Samuel opens with a desperate plea to the Lord from Hannah. She aches to have a child. Hannah is one of two wives. The other wife has provided her husband with children. Hannah has been unable to. However, Hannah is favored by her husband.


In 1:5-7 it says:
But to Hannah he (her husband) gave a double portion because he loved her, and the Lord had closed her womb. And because the Lord had closed her womb, her rival (the other wife) kept provoking her in order to irritate her. This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the Lord, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat.


The first thing that jumped out to me in this passage was the acknowledgement that it was the Lord's doing and will that her womb had been closed. 


They are not aware of it, but the stage is being set for a great leader to be raised up for Israel.


If Hannah had been able to conceive all those years, there would not have been that deep cry from within that compelled her to commit this child to the Lord.


The next thing that jumped out to me was how she handled adversity.


To add to her pain, she is being verbally abused by the other wife. Here she is living in this home with her husband, his other wife and their children. The other wife taunted her about not having children. It was degrading for a woman in those days to be considered barren. You would think that we would read of a bitter feud between the two wives. This is the perfect opportunity for jealousy, envy, anger, resentment and feelings of vengeance to emerge from such an onslaught. 


But, the only evidence of emotional struggle is an understandable deep sorrow...a bitterness of soul, great anguish and grief. With all this emotion raging within her, she did not lash out at the other wife. She resorted to pouring out her soul to the Lord.


I am reminded of a verse in Deuteronomy 8:2: Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep His commands.


In today's opinions, Hannah had every right to lash out towards the other wife and defend herself. But, instead she cried out to the Lord. She came to the absolute end of herself. She longed for a child so deeply that she committed this child to the Lord. And I believe this was the plan after all. In the process, the purity of her heart was being revealed. And now, as she pours her soul out to the Lord, He can't wait to bless her with a child! It is the moment He has been waiting for in Hannah's life. The fulfillment of His will and purposes.


Verse 20 says, So in the course of time Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel, saying: "Because I asked the Lord for him." 


When I feel that need coming on to defend myself, I think of Jesus. First I ask Him to reveal any sin that needs to be dealt with. I think of all that Jesus endured...for me...for you...for all of humanity! And He remained quiet! So, honestly, what right do we have to lash out when offended and risk our witness for Christ! I have been there. I struggle with this often. I definitely have not perfected this, but strive to become more and more obedient with each struggle He allows in my life. I ask Him often to bind up my mouth! The only way through it is with the surrendering of all to the Lord, who is sovereign, acknowledging your own sin and accepting Christ and all that He did for you, and then receiving that gift of the Holy Spirit which enables us to rise above our circumstances and live our lives in a way that makes an impact for the Kingdom of God.


I will add to this...you may have the Holy Spirit, but does He have you! Do you take control yourself or do you completely rely on the Spirit's lead within your being? Have you asked to be emptied of anything and everything that would hinder His control over you? Or do you like having control?


There is a peace, joy, strengthening and contentment that comes from allowing the Holy Spirit to have control. Try it! What have you got to lose?!


Dear Heavenly Father,


Thank You for Your Word that provides us with examples of those who have struggled, those who have endured difficult desert travels, those who have trusted You, those who have cried out to You! Thank You for Your Word that provides the evidence that You do hear us when we cry out to You...and You do answer our prayers! Thank You that Your Word is full of promises that give us hope! Thank You for the precious gift of Jesus and the promised gift of the Holy Spirit to those who believe! Thank You for giving Your children power through the enabling of the Holy Spirit within us to rise above our circumstances and give You glory!


In Jesus' Name, Amen

The Blessing of the Curse

THE BLESSING OF THE CURSE

This is for my sweet friend and instructor, Jeri! The two courses that she walked myself and other women through have given me tools that are far greater than any degree can provide!

Thank you, Jeri!

The opening video from Everybody Loves Raymond is one example of what happened in the garden of Eden. And with that one choice, we all have suffered.

As comical, yet sad as the video clip is, we can find the same scenario in scripture.

Genesis 3:1-7

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?” The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it or you will die.'” “You will not surely die,” the serpent said to the woman. “For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and ate it.

A few things to point out is that God did create man first, He created woman out of man. You will find in Genesis 2:15-17 that God took Adam and put him in the garden to take care of it. It was there that God gave Adam the command of what he was allowed to eat and not eat. Then, God created a suitable helper for Adam by taking one of his ribs out and creating women. So, Adam was responsible to lead his wife.

As humans do, mistakes were made. But, God always redeems!

Notice that when Eve was entertaining the serpent in conversation, Adam was right there. He was listening to the whole conversation and did nothing about it. Not only did he allow it to happen, he let his wife lead him into disaster. However, Eve did not respect Adam enough to consult him as to what she should do. She assumed control. As women we have a tendency to want to assume control but shift all the blame on the men when things go wrong. Adam was accountable to a greater measure because he was created to lead his wife...and he failed. Eve was accountable, as well. And today we feel the effects of the curse.

In the video clip, Ray failed Debra. As her husband, he is supposed to love, cherish and protect his wife. Much like Adam, he watched Debra as she struggled to remove a foreign object from her being. He let her down. He did not protect her and as a result her ability to feel safe with him and her respect for him has been damaged. Out of necessity and because of his passivity, she was forced to assume control over her own safety and well-being. In the show, she tends to treat him like he is stupid and he is okay with that because it keeps him from having to “man up”. It becomes a vicious cycle. At some point, someone has to decide to take the first step in submitting to God's ways and His will in order for change to happen.

One day my husband was working on our gas water heater. Gas terrifies me. As a result of my fears and need to control the situation, I hovered over my husband just in case something went wrong. He finally turned and said to me, “I don't need you to be my mom”. I apologized and closed the door. As mothers, we are wired to protect and take care of our children and other children too. But, I am not his mom and he is not a child. I displayed a lack of trust in his ability to take care of a need in our home. If that was a continual pattern, that would diminish his confidence in the role God created him (man) to fulfill. But, thank God my husband does not have a passive bone in his body and gently spoke how he felt instead of ignoring and stuffing; And that I did not get my feelings hurt, go pout or allow resentment to build. But, out of respect for him received what he had to say and let him be the man God created him to be.

One question that I have heard regarding Adam and Eve is, “If God created Adam and Eve and He is in control of all things, why didn't He intervene when Eve was being enticed by the serpent to eat the forbidden fruit?”. I am not a bible scholar. You may agree or disagree with what I have to say. But, my answer to that question based on the wisdom I have gained from seminary studies, from the Word and a few well known pastors is that God did not create us to be robots. He did create us to have free will. We have the ability to exercise our free will in such a way that we follow God's lead or our own selfish ways. The amazing truth though is that He already knows what we will choose and uses even our mistakes to draw us closer to Him. PRAISE GOD!

Regarding the curse:

Genesis 3:16

To the woman he said,

“I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing;

with pain you will give birth to children.

Your desire will be for your husband,

and he will rule over you.”

Okay, childbirth is painful, yes! The desire mentioned is not a sexual desire. It is for the role that the men have been created to fulfill as leaders. For me, I have decided to completely trust that God has fully equipped my husband to lead me and my family. Even if my husband makes a mistake along the way God allows it for our good and His glory. I am experiencing such a joy and peace of letting go of control. However, that joy and peace ultimately comes from trusting in the Lord! So, the blessing in the curse comes when I let go of that desire for control and give it all to God!